Lipstick in School

According to a news report, a certain private school in Sydney was recently faced with a unique problem.  A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.Every night the maintenance man would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back.

Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man.  She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine the yawns from the little princesses).

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.

He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it.  Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

Feels On Wheels

A “brothel bus” that detectives said cruised Miami Beach offering lap dances and drinks has taken its last ride, police said on Wednesday.Riders were offered oral sex for $100, according to Miami Beach police who impounded the limousine bus and arrested its operator early on Sunday.

The sleek black bus cruised the South Beach neighborhood popular among tourists and club-goers, offering rides and unlimited drinks for $40.

Aboard, undercover detectives said they found a fully stocked bar and several young women who strippeddown to reveal G-strings stuffed with cash and offered to perform sex acts.

Suspected operator Christine Morteh, 29, was arrested on charges of offering to commit prostitution, transportation for the purpose of prostitution and operating a business without a license. She was released from jail on $5,000 bond.

Employees and customers also were charged as part of a citywide prostitution crackdown that resulted in 75 arrests.

Parent put child on ebay

German Couple Loses Custody of 7-Month-Old Son After Posting Him on eBay for $1.60. BERLIN — Authorities in southern Germany have taken custody of a 7-month-old boy after his parents posted an ad on eBay offering to sell him for one euro, or about $1.60. Police spokesman Peter Hieber says the baby was placed in the care of youth services in the southwestern Allgaeu region. Hieber said on Saturday that the mother told police the Internet ad was only a joke. Authorities have begun an investigation into possible child trafficking against the parents. No offers were made for the child in the two hours and 30 minutes the ad was posted. The Internet auction site deleted the posting later. Several people who saw the ad alerted police.

Man put’s his life up for auction

A man in Australia is auctioning his life — his house, his job, his clothes and his friends — on eBay, after his marriage broke up, saying he wants to start a new life.“It’s time to move. A completely fresh start. I want to see where life takes me,” Ian Usher, 44, told Australian television on Tuesday from Perth in Western Australia state.

Usher said he was auctioning his life as “a package” with his house in Perth valued at around A$420,000 (US$385,000).

“Hi there, my name is Ian Usher, and I have had enough of my life! I don’t want it any more! You can have it if you like!,” reads his Web site www.alife4sale.com, which has a link to eBay for bidders.

Usher said his life auction, which starts on June 22, included not only his house, a car, a motorbike, a jet ski and a spa, but also an introduction to “great friends” and a job at a rug shop in Perth for a trial two-week period.

“When it’s over, I will just walk out the front door, take my wallet, my passport and start a new life,” he said.

Usher said his ex-wife had heard of his auction.

“Her last comment was, ‘it seems a bit mental to me’,” he said.

Remember to wear underwear

From the Northwest Florida Daily News comes this story of a Crestview couple who drove their car to Wal-Mart, only to have their car breakdown in the parking lot. The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car in the lot.

The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection, she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones.

Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand up his shorts, and tucked everything back into place. On regaining her feet, she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by. The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his forehead.

Paragliding Chihuahua Survives crash

A chihuahua that went paragliding in Australia strapped to its owner’s chest survived when the pair crashed into a tree shortly after taking off, police said Saturday.

Victoria state police said a 42-year-old man set off early Friday evening for what they described as “a routine flight” with his pet dog.

The man and his intrepid canine got into difficulties and crashed into a tree, where they became entangled 35 metres (115 foot) up.

Police found the pair after the man called them from his mobile phone, and they were safely retrieved from the tree after being stuck up there for almost five hours.

Police said the man received abrasions in the crash. The chihuahua was believed to be unharmed.

100’s of cats rescued From olympic site

LONDON (Reuters) - More than 160 feral cats and kittens have been rescued from the site of the London 2012 Olympics as demolition work continues at a pace.

 A local animal charity has been allowed access to the site to ensure the safety of the cats that have taken refuge in the various industrial buildings that are being bulldozed.

The Olympic Delivery Authority (ODA) said Friday that 168 animals had been discovered and were now in the care of the Celia Hammond Animal Trust.

The ODA, which has also re-housed newts, frogs and fish from the east London site, said demolition work was expected to be completed in March with construction on the main venues beginning later this year.

Snail mail is actually slower then a snail

Postal delivery is as slow as a snail, well at least it is Poland.

An IT consultant  received a letter on January 3 that was sent on December 20 as priority mail, he calculated that a snail would have made to his home faster then the letter.

Daily Gazeta Wyborcza said Michal Szybalski calculated that it took 294 hours for the letter to arrive at his home. He also said the distance between his home and the sender was 11.1 kilometers.

Given the distance and the time, the speed of the letter was 0.03775 kilometers per hour. Szybalski calculated that a garden snail travels at around 0.048 kilometers per hour.

Hanging Stunt goes Wrong

VANCOUVER, British Columbia (Reuters) - A man was recovering in a Vancouver-area hospital after an attempt to film a mock hanging as a stunt accidentally became the real thing, police said on Thursday.

The 23-year-old man thought he had protected himself by wearing a harness when he went to a suburban park on Wednesday to have a friend record him dangling lifelessly from a tree, the Royal Canadian Mounted Police said.

“Unfortunately things did not go as planned and the male was unintentionally hung from the rope he had placed around his neck,” according to a police spokesman who said the friend initially did not realize anything was wrong.

Neither man was trained as a stunt actor, according to the police statement that added: “The ‘Don’t Try This at Home!’ disclaimers on commercials and movies are there for a reason.”